its a stupid song

Holy moose and cheese filled poptarts

Thu, 15 Jan 2009 04:19:48 GMT

I took a trip down memory lane tonight. I reread through some really old myspace messages. I read some from random people I was trying to make friends with, as well as the first communications with my love, Larry. Seeing our first talks after so long was.... really amazing. I forgot about them, aside from the initial "let's hang out" things. We've grown up a lot, although honestly we're still so goofy at the same time. Reading the messages tonight and joking with him about them just proves our silliness. I feel like I did at the beginning. I've been giggling and giddy all night since then.

Be still my love, open up your heart, let the light shine in

Thu, 25 Dec 2008 06:16:18 GMT

I feel like I need to do something drastically charitable. I have no right to criticize an inconsiderate society if I'm not doing anything to make it better.

I posted this everywhere else.... why not here?

Fri, 12 Dec 2008 05:14:22 GMT

http://www.latimes.com/news/obituaries/la-me-page12-2008dec12,0,5310709.story

Betty Page was such an inspirational woman. She'll live on in all of our retro-bondage hearts.

The baby girl!

Mon, 24 Nov 2008 18:04:00 GMT

I forgot to introduce the newest member of the family....
Her name is Arie, she's one of the semi-feral kittens Larry and I trapped. She was the most wild of the bunch and no one seemed to want her. After weeks of heartbreak and false hopes of her getting adopted, I convinced my mom to let me keep her. She is such a little cuddle monster.

In this picture, I had been writing my 1500 word essay all day and she didn't think I was spending enough time lovin' on her... so she decided to force me to. She stayed there for a good half hour while I was writing, after I took a photo op break. :P

This now makes 3 cats, 2 rats... my furry family is definitely growing.

Easily amused

Tue, 16 Sep 2008 04:37:44 GMT

This made me laugh so hard I cried.

Tiffy vs. Apple

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 17:06:53 GMT

After 4 years of fighting with a crappy laptop, Apple has finally admitted that my laptop is not up to par. Every 6 months to a year since I've gotten that cursed machine I've had to take it in for repair. I've gotten new hard drives, new motherboards, new optical drives and several other repairs I don't even remember. Today, when going in for a broken optical drive that was just replaced in February, Apple finally concluded that I've done enough repairs and I deserve a new one.
In 10-14 days, I'll the the proud owner of a brand new Macbook, which in itself is an upgrade from the iBook I previously had. Not only is this awesome, it is just in the nick of time. My warranty expires next month just as I get back into school.
In the mean time, I'm without my own computer. I'll be able to check my e-mail and such, but as far as contact goes my cell is the best option.

Antici.....pation.

Fri, 27 Jun 2008 05:02:02 GMT

Say hi to this little critter. She's going to be the newest addition to my home. I'm trying to pick a good name for her but it's been really hard. I'm thinking Opal right now, but that will probably change about a billion times before I get my hands on her. She's a ~~odd eyed~~ ruby eyed rex dumbo and as cute as a button. I'm hoping Spades likes her as much as I do already.

Looking for someone to paint the nails on her left hand.

Thu, 29 May 2008 08:03:08 GMT

My work closes at 7pm.

We got out at 9pm today.

And then I came home to scrub poop steaks off the couch.

Thanks Jody.

This is not Romeo, he's some other where.

Sun, 11 May 2008 03:38:49 GMT

So, we decided to wait until the weekend to put Romeo down. We did it today at my house when everyone was done work. We thought that since he liked it here so much it might be nicer to have him be on a comfy bed then on a table at the office. So the doctors on staff today and some of the techs came by and we all sat around my bed to say good bye. You'd think that since I was crying every day since TUESDAY I would have dried up by now. That was not the case.

I just hope I made his last days enjoyable....

Ay, mine own fortune in my misery.

Wed, 07 May 2008 19:07:27 GMT

I'm sitting here in my bedroom on my day off with Romeo our hospital cat. I took him home with me last night to spend a couple nights in a warm squishy bed. Tomorrow he'll be put down. He has cancer in his chest and it's progressing to the point where it's made his limbs swollen. I know it needs to be done. I know if he's not already, he'll be suffering soon. But I can't stop crying.

Right now, he's sprawled out on the bed snoozing. We spent a half hour this morning sitting in the window enjoying the breeze and watching bugs and squirrels running around. I hope he liked it.

Another dying animal in my life...

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 21:15:48 GMT

I'm not ready to say goodbye. :*(

You say a lot in a single silence.

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 02:40:48 GMT

I've come to realize just how completely nerdy I truly am. It's not so bad though. I can live with it. :) At least I have someone to share my nerdhood with.

Things have been going well in my world. Not an excessive amount going on but that's ok. I spend most of my days at work, and most of my nights with Larry. Been trying to go to the gym more frequently, and not going out to eat as much. I've lost 8 pounds with only a little effort, so Yay! Not really comparable to the 30 pounds I've gained in 3 years but it's a work in progress.

Lately, I've been yearning to break out of my cage. I want to move out worse then ever before. I want my own place. My own little space in the world, where I don't have to worry about getting yelled at like a child. I thought I'd have that here, but the walls are thin and apparently I'm a disaster to live with. I need to install locks on my doors to ensure my privacy. It's a sad thing when your 21 years old and your mother still comes in your space whenever she pleases to root around. It really makes me feel like I'm 14 again. She's just lucky I'm not a complete asshole. Cause if I wanted to really fuck her over I could leave... then she'd be screwed with the mortgage. I don't think I could ever be that big a prick though, no matter how much I wish I could.

Oh, if anyway wants a couple of cats, let me know. I'm trying to help a friend place her 2 little ones. Her son is severely allergic so unfortunately she needs to find them a new home.

I'm tired.

This makes me really sad....

Thu, 17 Apr 2008 01:08:54 GMT

http://news.softpedia.com/news/Artist-Leaves-Dog-To-Die-on-Exhibition-Display-82091.shtml

Goodbye dear friend.

Mon, 31 Mar 2008 13:40:07 GMT

We put Cashew down yesterday, then buried him in Larry's back yard. I'm sorry to all the calls I didn't answer and the texts I didn't respond to. I had more important things to do.

The future was wide open

Mon, 14 Jan 2008 05:30:34 GMT

She will be mine.... oh yes, she will be mine.

Take a look at me now...

Mon, 07 Jan 2008 05:55:24 GMT

Over 2 months have past and I still get sick over you. Maybe a break in our friendship is what we need. I look forward to it just as much as I fear it.

Sunlight never touched me, daylight doesn't want me

Fri, 28 Dec 2007 23:41:06 GMT

Falling back into old patterns is far too easy. Same story, new characters. I need to change the scenario... I just wish I could change the scenery first. I want an ocean between me and everything familiar. I don't know how else to make the change, cause apparently relying on my own self restraint and self esteem isn't working. I'm still naive, people still take advantage.

I think I hear London calling my name....

It's all still there.

Sun, 11 Nov 2007 02:44:30 GMT

Mon coeur sera toujours pour toi.

Mon, 05 Nov 2007 07:01:29 GMT

What the fuck is wrong with people sometimes?!

I don't appreciate this at all. I don't appreciate the fact that I was strung along until another option surfaced. Fuck boys. Fuck people in general.

Bang bang... my baby shot me down.

Thu, 01 Nov 2007 21:57:11 GMT

It's official. There's no going back, there's no answers to my questions. All I have to go on is the fact that Larry and I are done, and I don't know where it went wrong.

Complacency. That was his best response.

It's really sad that everything can be great one day, then one small comment, followed by a small action later, and it's like the past 2 years have been worthless. You dedicate a portion of your life to someone, who won't even try to work out the problems because it's just easier to dump you. What's even sadder is that I'm the one that should have broken it off, NOT the one that should have been brushed aside. Silly me, I was under the impression that normal couples work through their problems like adults. But, really, what do I know anyway.

Now, I have to learn to be "just friends" with someone who's never been just that.

Soon I'll have to start going through my bedroom, collecting his things and putting them in a box to the side. That'll be fun........:(

And I know... My heart's no longer mine

Mon, 29 Oct 2007 17:13:14 GMT

I really, really, really wish I understood people better. Almost 2 fucking years and I still couldn't get him to open up to me. And after all the other BS that's what ends us. Go figure.

Fri, 26 Oct 2007 05:52:56 GMT

I'm just going to repost the bulletin I put on myspace because it'll tell you why I'm so fucking angry right now.

Let's start from the beginning of this story shall we?

My mom called me at work today at 3 while she was on her way to the ER. I stay there with her all day and we were told she needed an emergency appen..omy. They began surgery at 10pm. At 11.45 the surgeon came out to see me and tell me everything went ok (Yay!) and that someone would be with me "in a couple minutes" to take me to my mom.

AN HOUR AND A HALF LATER..... there's no one in the waiting room to direction questions to and the number I was told to call (by the sign on the counter) with questions was not being answered. So I called John to tell him I was still waiting and that I had no idea what was going on.... only to find out that he was already in visiting with her??!!!?!?!?!?! Apparently, they were "looking all over for me". Which means, they looked everywhere except the one place I was supposed to be (and still was). I was at the hospital for 10 1/2 hours.

What the FUCK!

Anyway, my mom will be in the hospital through tomorrow, possible until Sunday. Due to that, and the fact that I'm no longer in a partying mood thanks to the incompetent medical staff, I'm canceling the bar crawl. Sorry to those were intended to come....

Can't sleep again...

Fri, 19 Oct 2007 06:54:15 GMT

An 'Adult" survey I stole from a myspace bulletin. I have too many family members to post it there.

Adult Questions - Don't Be a chicken and don't lie!!!!!

1. Is there anyone on your friends list you would ever consider having sex with?
Yep

2. Sex in the morning, afternoon or night?
All of thee above?

3. What side of the bed do you sleep on?..
Where ever I feel like

4. Pork, beef, or chicken?
Chicken or beef

5. Have you ever had to pull over on the side of the road to puke?
Yeah, my first day of college (not because of that though...)

6. Have you ever puked during sex?
No...

7. Shower or bath?
Shower mostly

8. Do you pee in the shower?
Every chance I get... not really

9. Mexican or Chinese?
Both

10. Do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed?
Aggressive

11. Do you love someone on your top friends?
Yes

12. Do you know all the people on your friends list?
If not all of them it's cause of a few bands or something.

13. Love or Money?
Both.

14. Credit cards or cash?
Debit, I don't like to play around with money I don't have.

15. Has there ever been anyone in your family you wish wasn't?
Maybe

16. Would you rather go camping or to a 5 star hotel?
hotel

17. have you ever been to a "FUN" party?
What kinda parties aren't fun?

18. Would you shave your entire body (including your head) for money?
We'd have to be talking about a LOT of money.

19. Have you ever been to a strip club?
Twice

20. Ever been to a bar?
Yeah, and I'm still 4 days away from being 21

21. Ever been kicked out of a bar or a club?
No

22. Ever been so drunk you had to be carried out of somewhere?
I've have to be picked up off the floor..... but not carried.

23. Kissed someone of the same sex?
Yeah

24. Favorite drink?
Pineapple juice

25. Had sex in a movie theater?
No

26. Had sex in a bathroom?
Mmmm partially?

27. Have you ever had sex at work?
No

28. Have you ever been in an "adult" store?
Only once just cause. I bought my boyfriend Anime porn as a joke.

29. Bought something from an adult store?
Refer to above

30. Have you been caught having sex?
Um... not that I can remember

31. Have you ever kissed a stranger?
Yeah

32. Does anyone have naughty pics of u?
Ok, I'll admit to it...

1. Song that always makes you sad?
I don't know... there's a couple.

2. Last thing you bought?
Clothes from Victoria's Secret. Some really neat sweaters!

3. Last person you argued with?
Larry, but it was only a pseudo argument.

4. Do you put Butter before putting the peanut butter on?
Ewww no

5. One of your stuffed animals' names as a kid?
I don't think I named them.

6. Did you ever own at one time a Barenaked Ladies Cd?
Nope

7. Favorite day of the week?
Saturday

8. Favorite Sundae topping?
Caramel

9. Did you take Piano lessons?
I took singing lessons and she taught me a little piano.

10. Most frequent song played?
It varies every few months

11. T.V. show you secretly enjoy?
Project Runway. I was off work one day and too lazy to change the channel.

12. Would you rather play basketball or hockey?
Basketball, my hand got run over my an ice skate before, luckily it was only a scratch.

13. Date someone older or younger?
Older, I normally like 'em a few years older but the 4 and some odd months is working well.

14. One place you wish you could travel right now?
Italy

15. Do you use umbrellas?
Nope

16. Do you know all the words to the Canadian national anthem?
"Oh Canada...our home and native land"???

17. Favorite Cheese?
Mozzarella

18. The Smith's or the Cure?
The Cure

19. Do you prefer Blondes or Brunettes?
Brunettes

20. Best job you ever had?
Bay Ridge Animal Hospital

21. did you go to your high school prom?
Yeah, I kinda wish I had a date though.

22. perfect time to wake up?
10am seems to have been working for me on my days off.

23. perfect time to go to bed?
Earlier then now...

24. do you use your queen right away in chess? ..
Sooner then I probably should...

25. Ever been in a car accident?
Not a serious one... knock on wood

26. closer to mom or dad...or neither?
Mom, I don't speak to my dad.

27. what age is this exciting life over for you?
I used to think I'd be dead at 28. I donno about that anymore.

28. what decade during the 20th century would you have chosen to be a teenager?
40's or 50's

29. Favorite shoes you have EVER owned?
My first pair of white chucks.

30. Do you have an article of clothing you have had since you were in high school?
A few tee shirts.

31. Were you in track and field?
Nope

32. Were you ever in a school talent show?
Yes, every 5th grader had to, no matter how much they didn't want to be. And then I was in chorus and guitar in 8th grade

33. Have you ever written in a library book?
Not that I remember

34. Allergic to?
I don't know exactly, but I break out in rashes when I rake leaves, use certain cleaners, or come in contact with some dusts.

35. Favorite fruit?
Pineapples, strawberries, and blueberries.

36. Have you watched sex and the city?
Yea

37. Baseball hat or toque?
I had to look up the 2nd one...

38. Do you shampoo first in the shower or soap?
Shampoo

39. Wet the toothbrush or brush dry with the toothpaste?
Wet

40. Pen or pencil?
Pen

41. Have you ever gambled at a casino?
Nope

42. Have you thrown up on a plane?
No

43. Have you thrown up in a car?
Hah yeah.... poor Merry.

44. Have you thrown up at work?
Yeah

45. Do you scream on roller coasters?
Yes

46. Who was your first prom date?
Zoe

47. Who was your first roommate?
Never had the pleasure...

48. What alcoholic beverage did you drink when you got drunk for the first time?
Jeeze, um... there was the accidental strawberry daiquiri when I was 4. After that I don't remember.

49. What was your first job?
Mother's helper... then Baskin Robin's scooper

50. What was your first car?
'95 Neon

51. When did you go to your first funeral?
Years and years ago for my Uncle Harry.

52. How old were you when you first moved away from your hometown?
11

53. Who was your first grade teacher?
Mrs. Caputo, I donno how to spell it.

54. Where did you go on your first airplane ride?
Florida, I think.

55. When you snuck out of your house for the first time, who was it with?
Manda, we went down the street to talk to some friends.

56. Who was your first Best Friend and are you still friends with them?
Either Nadia or Jennifer. I can't remember who came first.

57. Where did you live the first time you moved out of your parent's house?
I'm still here unfortunately.

58. Who is the first person you call when you have a bad day?
Larry

59. Who's wedding were you in the first time you were a bridesmaid or a groomsmen?
First and only time for my Uncle Larry.

60. What is the first thing you do in the morning?
Grumble.

61. What was the first concert you attended?
Bon Jovi

62. First tattoo or piercing?
My ears. My first tattoo was on my 18th birthday, a music note on my hip.

63. First celebrity crush?
JTT OMG

6 days to go

Wed, 17 Oct 2007 05:24:45 GMT

I want a new tattoo for my birthday.

The newest addition to my family...

Fri, 12 Oct 2007 02:46:08 GMT

Everyone, meet Spades.